Spin Offs, Beans A

Spin Offs, Beans A

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Kik-Cha-Vit hated humans. They stank, they were clumsy and they were rather stupid. Maybe not all of them, but in his experience, that was how most of them came across. Why did they stink so much? He did not remember the rural humans smelling like the ones in the city did, but then, it had been a long number of years since he had been a country lad.

GreensBridge was a good city though, despite its mostly human population. He liked the mazes of buildings, especially in the areas where the structures were built closer together. It meant he could be out and about more in the day, there was less of the blinding brightness of the sun, particularly in the back alleys. There were the sewers, catacombs, deep cellars and other secret spots hidden below the city, the humans rarely went into the dark depths. The city also provided much more opportunity for food and treasures. Since coming to the GreensBridge, nearly a decade ago, Kik had become very rich.

He had gained his wealth in any number of ways; thievery, murder and other wholesome habits. Unlike some of the other goblin-folk he never compromised his own nature to get along in GreensBridge. Many others did though, Kik thought he might hate those goblins more than the stinky humans. Why pretend to be human? Dressing like them was uncomfortable and it also restricted one’s freedom of movement. So what if humans thought goblins were ugly or foolish? Kik was not the sort to hide his nose behind a veil. He did not understand why so many goblins thought owning property in the city was a big deal.

Kik-Cha-Vit had no deeds, no titles and did not belong to any guilds. Yet, he had more homes than most other people in GreensBridge. Probably not more than the count and the other well to do military families, but that was not something those people had earned or created for themselves. It was hereditary, passed down from one generation to the next. Kik had found his homes and made them his own, in his own lifetime. More importantly he had lots of treasures.

He had so much treasure he thought he could afford a well to do mate, but had decided when he was a younger goblin that he was not going to chase females. They were too demanding, they expected the best treasures, the best food and he had seen many a good goblin lad do themselves in trying to win the favour of a greedy female. Not having a mate meant he kept all the wealth he had earned. All of his secret homes and hidden treasures made him happy. Just thinking about it made him grin.

Which a goblin should not do in a crowded street. The human female closest to him grabbed her child and quickly put the ugly runt behind her. Then she had the audacity to shoo him away, waving her hand at him like he was an insect. So, he kept grinning at her and wished her well in his most formal tones. Of course the ugly cow-human did not know goblin words, she scrunched up her face and shooed him away again.

Kik skipped along, the day was overcast, the fog and clouds meant the disk of the sky-orb was pale. It was a perfect day to move some of his recent acquisitions to his homes. Most of the other goblins would be asleep or fretting about the coming winter. Kik had not worried about winter for many years, two of his homes were more than warm enough to be comfy throughout the year.

“Hey Beans. Com’ere little buddy.”

Kik liked Meat-Pie, mostly because the young fellow always gave him a meat tart and rarely complained if Kik snatched an extra one or two for the road. Six years ago, when the lad was not much taller than he, the two of them had come to an understanding. In exchange for a few weight, Meat-Pie kept him informed about the goings-on along the street where he vended his wares.

“What’s ‘een happening?” He asked after accepting the tart. Like all goblins he had a hard time speaking Andalee, similarly humans could not speak the goblin language very well.

“Thought you’d want to know, the old lady that used to live above the candle makers, she died. Two nights ago. Apparently there’s a relative coming in from the West March to claim her stuff. Sounds like it’ll still be a day or two before he can come into the city, likely busy with the harvest I’d imagine.”

This was welcome news. He had thought the crazy old lady would have died years ago, she had been sick for a long time. Once she had been a famous performer and had acquainted herself with many fine young men over the years. Everyone knew she had been filthy rich.

“Thanks for that, good lead.” He fished a silver weight from his hidden pouch and passed it to Meat-Pie. The kid was happy with the silver, Kik made a point of paying him well. “Any whispers about the Fingures clan?”

“Haven’t heard anything interesting, sorry.”

“That’s okay. I need to be walking. ‘usy day.”

“Alright. Here, have another tart.”

“Itsha, gissi-cha.” He thanked his associate and then moved on. He was tempted to go investigate the old lady’s room immediately, but needed to empty out at least a couple of his stashes. Besides, the candle makers would be busy for most of the day and they had half a dozen adopted children in the place. Best to wait until it was dark.

Kik-Cha-Vit spent much of the rest of the day moving around the Grey District transferring his hard earned wealth from one place to another. Some of it went to his secret homes within the Grey and some of it went to other stash points more conveniently located so that he could later transport it elsewhere within the city. He never moved a lot of his treasures during any given transfer, always a small amount, easily concealed within a box or sack that would typically contain a few mundane items to help him hide his true purpose. He was not overly concerned about the guards, he had learned to avoid their most common patrols and so long as he stayed in the Grey they rarely bothered him even when they did cross paths. It was the other goblins he was more concerned about.

By nature goblins were inquisitive and sneaky, always looking for an opportunity to make some easy gains, be it food, ideas or treasures. Most notably, young males looking to impress a mate were the most aggressive when it came to this sort of thing. To counter this opportunistic behaviour, Kik had cultivated a reputation as an eccentric, more interested in the goings-on within the city than in material wealth. More likely to wear a sack than try to fit in with what was considered acceptable. As a result most humans paid him little attention and the vast majority of goblins remained unconcerned about his intentions. To many he was just another underachieving middle-aged goblin.


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